Cory Booker’s Engagement, South Asian Dating Pressure, and the Politics of Appearances
Cory Booker announced his engagement on Tuesday. Instagram/corybooker
This is the third week in a row we’re talking about celebrity engagements—and no, I didn’t plan it that way! Engagement announcements have just dominated headlines lately, giving us a fascinating lens into how culture, love, and relationships are perceived in the public eye. This week’s trending story is Senator Cory Booker’s engagement to Alexis Lewis, which has sparked its fair share of commentary and speculation. Some say the timing is political, others joke that he’s softening his “robotic” image ahead of a potential presidential run, and many have pointed out the uncanny resemblance between his fiancée and his previous celebrity girlfriend, Rosario Dawson.
While Booker’s engagement may be making headlines for its optics, it also highlights something deeply familiar to South Asian singles: the way society treats marriage as a milestone and the pressure to conform to cultural expectations.
Booker’s Relationship Story: From Rosario Dawson to Alexis Lewis
To understand why there’s so much commentary (and criticism) around this engagement, it helps to know Booker’s more recent relationship history and what Alexis Lewis brings to the story.
Former relationship with Rosario Dawson: Booker dated actress Rosario Dawson for over two years before they broke up in February 2022. They met in 2018 through mutual connections, reconnected over time, and made public appearances together—including moving in together in 2020. Their relationship, though high profile, was mostly kept out of full daily view until certain events (airport interviews, public appearances) made it more visible.
Meeting Alexis Lewis & engagement details: Booker and Alexis Lewis have been together for about a year and a half and they live together in Washington, D.C. Their relationship reportedly started after being set up by a mutual friend, even though at first Booker hesitated because of the geographic distance with Lewis living in LA at the time.
The proposal & public announcement: On September 2, 2025, Booker announced their engagement via Instagram, sharing photos of a romantic beachside proposal. He wrote about how Alexis has “transformed” him—grounding his inner life, helping him discover the joy of building a nurturing home with someone he loves. The photos show scenes with leis (flower garlands), Booker down on one knee, them embracing, him pointing to her engagement ring, and moments of joyful surprise.
Booker’s reflections & aspirations: Booker has publicly shared that he wants to be married and have children—something he says he did not always feel free to prioritize in his past roles (for instance, when he was mayor, he once described his job as “my relationship,” with everything else secondary). He’s also spoken about how this relationship with Alexis has made him a better senator—how being in a personal, joyful space can bring strength, not a distraction.
Public reaction & comparisons: Almost immediately after the announcement, people online noticed a resemblance between Alexis Lewis and Rosario Dawson. Some speculated that Booker has a “type” and that Alexis looks like Rosario, or that the selection was intentional to evoke a similar image. Others questioned whether the engagement is timed or strategic.
Marriage as a Status Symbol
In South Asian culture, marriage is often seen as an achievement rather than a personal milestone. Parents proudly introduce their children as “settled” only after they’ve tied the knot. Matrimonial ads highlight not just education and income, but whether someone is married, divorced, or “never married,” as if marital status is a credential.
This mindset creates immense pressure on singles to “perform” marriageability—to appear ready for marriage and to choose partners who will impress their families and communities. When we see public figures like Booker being scrutinized for being single, it reinforces a global narrative: that being unmarried past a certain age is a character flaw, something that needs to be “fixed” with the right partner.
The Persistent Homophobia
Adding another layer of pressure is the persistent assumption that unmarried men are secretly gay. Booker himself has faced years of speculation about his sexuality, simply because he was a bachelor. In South Asian communities, this assumption is just as rampant, and it’s damaging in two ways:
It stigmatizes and erases LGBTQ+ individuals, treating queerness as something shameful.
It pressures heterosexual singles into rushing into relationships or marriages to “prove” their straightness.
There is nothing wrong with being gay. What’s wrong is that our culture uses marriage as a litmus test for morality or social worth.
Relationships Shouldn’t Be for Show
Whether Booker’s engagement is genuine or strategic is irrelevant—he says he’s joyful, and if that’s true, that’s all that should matter. But for South Asian singles navigating dating, this moment is a reminder not to fall into the trap of appearances. Don’t jump into relationships just because your friends are getting married or because your family wants to see you “settled.” And don’t stay in a relationship for the optics—whether that’s to avoid rumors, please others, or fit into cultural expectations.
The truth is, authentic love takes time. If your relationship is joyful and nourishing, it’s worth celebrating, no matter how unconventional the timing or the match.
Advice for Singles
Don’t Date for Optics: If you’re dating just to prove something to your family, friends, or the world, you risk building a relationship on shaky foundations.
Don’t Let the Critics In: Booker is already facing jokes and criticism, but he’s celebrating his happiness anyway. Protect your relationship from outside noise—what matters most is how you feel with your partner.
Challenge Cultural Narratives: Whether it’s homophobia or marriage-as-status, we have the power to rewrite these outdated scripts in our families and communities.
Take Your Time: A loving, lasting relationship isn’t a race.
Booker’s engagement may be splashed across headlines, but when you see the photos and read his words, you notice something genuine: he seems excited about being with Alexis now, not just about how things look. His story—from Rosario Dawson, from being a bachelor in the public eye, to now publicly cherishing a serious relationship—mirrors a tension many in South Asian communities feel: the pull between public expectation and private joy.
Real love isn’t about optics. It’s about joy—the kind of joy that makes you laugh at the noise and celebrate your own story, regardless of what the world says.
